Funny Alternate Meanings for Common Words

I have no idea if this list is really from the wp (a friend email it me), but it made me laugh and its nice way to head out for the weekend. btw – Happy New Year to all readers!

The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly
contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words.

And the winners are:

1. Coffee , n. The person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted , adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has
gained.

3. Abdicate , v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade , v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly , adj. Impotent.

6. Negligent , adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a
nightgown.

7. Lymph , v. To walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle , n. Olive-flavored mouthwash

9. Flatulence , n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been
run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash , n. A rapidly receding hairline..

11. Testicle , n. A humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude , n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon , n.. A Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster , n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism , n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up
onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent , n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish
men.

Migration of the Yahoos

This comic on The Joy Of Tech is hilarious – true geek humour. And of course lots of other posts around on the exodus at Yahoo. I guess there is no more peanut butter left. btw – Stewart Butterfield resignation letter is weird and wonderful.

NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF US INDEPENDENCE

Of course not. But get ready for April Fool’s Day (a nice post of RWW worth on the subject) on the web. I wonder what version 2008 will have in store for us and the USA? btw – this is just me trying to pad out the number of posts for the month of March. Enjoy.

The Onion Joins the Social Networking Fray

I am not sure that this isn’t just a bit of fun for the folks at The Onion. But they may be launching a new social netoworking site called Frrvrr.

Videos for the Weekend

A funny and yet disturbing video from BBtv:

Boing Boing tv, surreal shorts about food and drink, in a two-part showcase of works from filmmaker Stefan Nadelman. First, “Food Fight,” a stop-animation piece that provides an abridged history of war, told through the foods of the countries in conflict (Ed.: the original work has been edited for time, and captions have been added to assist the history-impaired). Next, “My Dog Impersonating Orson Welles,” in which a pooch clutches a bottle of champagne, and attempts to form sentences.





Plus, Will is at it again with Semi-pro:




Plus here’s one from MSFT insider Tina at on10.net – about life at Microsoft. I am not sure its really funny or just trying really hard to be funny? You decide.

Over on AdViking this Week, plus a dash of humour for the wkend

Couple of decent posts worth checking out over on sister blog AdViking:

• Post-Mobile World Congress Wrap Up – from Barcelona
• ISP Advertising Moves, Google Video Ad Push

Also, hoping that Simon expands on insight from this week’s Fast Forward search conference in Florida. I am guessing he’s got his silver card on BA by now with all this travel.

Well, that’s wrap for this working week. And here’s funnny one strip from xkcd – enjoy!

Tips to Improve Your Presentation Style

 

This piece on Business Week – Deliver a Presentation like Steve Jobs - is pretty cool and well worth a read if you want some good tips to help improve your presentation style. Even mere mortals like me should try to learn a thing or two from one of the master presenters of all time - the Apple CEO (and a master of spin). Don’t get me wrong, I am never going to present on such a scale (ie, no delusions of glory here on A Fuller View), but even if just to a handful of co-workers or 30 people at a trade show, it is always a good idea to try to improve the quality of any presentation. There are just so many boring presentation styles; my biggest goal is to at least “NOT be boring!” Here are the 10 tips, my faves are Nos 2, 4 & 7:

1. Set the theme
2. Demonstrate enthusiasm
3. Provide an outline
4. Make numbers meaningful
5. Try for an unforgettable moment
6. Create visual slides
7. Give ‘em a show
8. Don’t sweat the small stuff
9. Sell the benefit
10. Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse

Even FSJ almost agrees this is a good analysis of his style.

Bubble Video is Back!

Sweet – the Bubble video is back on YouTube as v1.1. More info on TechCrunch and the Scales own blog. Enjoy!




FSJ Posts a Sweet Analysis on NYT Piece re: G v M

Ok, maybe my short post was a little mis-guided or optimistic? … I have now been totally enlightened by this razor sharp (or should I say “roasted on spitoon”) analysis from Fake Steve Jobs over at Forbes or is it Sim City. The best part are the book titles:

Radical Velocity: How Google Succeeds Without Planning.
Totally Random: How to Accelerate Your Business Using Pure, Dumb Luck.

I know its not Friday, but this is funny… btw – I am winding down for the Christmas break all this week, but I am still hoping to get my 100th post out before the end of the year and deliver a couple usefull pieces along the way. In meantime I gotta laugh.

DMCA Takedown of Video

Last week, I posted about the hilarious Richter Scales paradoy video “Here Comes Another Bubble” - which apparently has been taken down from YouTube for now. Well, I gotta say someone is being a bit of a cry baby! I think this fair use, but hey I am just a blogger… Please put the video back up. Of course give credit where it is due.

Follow-up: more on the credit issue at Valleywag and Scoble.